The Truth On Black Men: Don't Believe Everything You Read, See Or Hear!

Last night, I attended my husband’s 20th year high school reunion. It was really fun watching my husband interact with people he hadn’t seen in years. I listened as they talked about their lives over the last 20 years: what they’ve been doing, their marital status, whether they had children and just what they hoped to accomplish over the course of the next 20 years. I couldn’t help but feel proud that so many people had left high school and achieved great things. With no one group was this clearer, than with the black men who had gone to school with my husband.

If you listen to the statistics on the state of black men, it’s easy to get disheartened. However, there is nothing like facts and human examples to highlight that statistics may not be an accurate reflection of the entire story. Yes, it is true that the black men the statistics usually capture aren’t those men who were at my husband’s reunion but rather those who don’t graduate high school. But why isn’t that the case? Why do we as a society spend so much time focusing on those who don’t graduate or who are in jail rather than those who did graduate, are in college and those who found success despite the odds, those who achieved things they were expected to achieve and those who achieved things they weren’t.

While I do think it’s important to discuss those issues that negatively affect our community and our black men, I think it is also important that we discuss the positive side. I for one have always known there is more to our story and the story of our sons, brothers, fathers and nephews other than what you see on TV, and read in government or social organization reports. My husband’s reunion is a testament to that reality. Last night, I encountered lawyers, actors, doctors, accountants, business men and entrepreneurs. I encountered black men with families and those, both single and married, playing an active role in the lives of their children and their communities. The reunion was a stark reminder to me that we too often forget about the unsung achievers of our community: those men who are helping keep our communities together and leading the way. They represent all that are young men can strive to become and have to look up to. And as moms, we should constantly be reminding our children that those examples exist within our community despite what they see on television and in the videos, read in the papers or hear about themselves in the streets.